Authenticity in a Tomato

Yesterday I had the priviledge of visiting with one of my neighbors from our previous residence. If you've read the blog recently, you know that we moved out into the boonies and visitors are a welcome addition to our days of raising kids and chickens, cooking, landscaping 8 acres and trying to get inspired to write in the process.

So, when my neighbor revealed a sparkly bag with housewarming gifts, it wasn't the nice bottle of wine that will go great with Lemon Chicken and Dill Cream Sauce or Herbed Salmon, nor was it the beautiful squash and zucchini she grew in her garden that made my heart skip...it was the beautiful bag of tomatoes.

I grew up in Southern California and my grandfather grew tomatoes on his back porch. I remember eating so many tomatoes that my mouth developed acid sores that stung for a good 24 hours after plunging myself into the pleasure of this delicacy. I'm so glad God puts these little "you've had too many" cautionary reminders into life's experiences.

Now, if you are a gardener in the Northwest, you know that tomatoes are very difficult to grow here. There just isn't enough intense heat to generate a juicy, red, sweet tomato...the way an authentic tomato is supposed to taste. These were not the tomatoes from the grocery store. I'm not sure what those ones are that they try to sell us, the sign says "Tomato" but they taste like plastic, and ruin Caprese salad. And so, this is why I was so excited for this rare delicacy: a beautiful handful of real, authentic tomatoes in the Pacific Northwest.

They inspired me to think about "Authenticity." Our culture is so filled with temptations which appear to be the real thing, but upon indulging, end up being a phony replica of our intended desire. I can't remember the last time, before the tomatoes, I looked at something or someone and thought about the word "Authentic." I'm including the mirror in that last statement too. I want to be more "Authentic" but how?

If you have any ideas let me know...for now I will indulge in those juicy, sweet and real tomatoes...oops, they're are a figment of my imagination now since I ate them all without abandon...no sores this time, though!

Rain

Living in the Northwest offers many, many, many days of unending rain. Most of the time I just accept it during the Fall and Winter months as part of living here, the reason why our state is so green, making Spring and Summer amazing.

But during August, I actually find myself a little grumpy about it because my expectation is that it should be blazing hot.

Today is an August rainy day. And I'm not the least bit grumpy about it. Why?

It's all about expectations and perspective. Today I woke without any expectation of how the day should be. When I heard the rain out my window as I woke from slumber, my perspective shifted to baking cookies, candles, reading and snuggling with my family.

If only I could shed expectations from all my days and shift my perspective to embrace the moment. If only...all my days.

So, maybe I will find inspiration in the rain today. Maybe I will fully embrace this amazing miracle that falls from Heaven. As long as it doesn't fall next week when relatives will be visiting, or for the first day of school, or for my Birthday...I've got a lot of work to do!

Inspiration Part Two- The List

My quiet morning just ended as the landscapers have arrived and sent the retreiver and the hunting dog into a fit. Good morning everyone. I'm in much need of a second cup of coffee, but am still in jammies and don't want anyone to see me through the windows. So, here I blog.

I'm still looking for inspiration to write again...I figure I'll just sit down and free form for a while until something logical takes shape. I hope you don't mind.

Today is a task-oriented day. I have to 1) go to the feed store to get chicken feed 2) PO Box 3) grocery store 4) laundry 5) packing for overnight 6) cleaning 7) organizing and breakfast, lunch, snack, dinner. But I do get to go have dinner with another friend tonight, so it will be a nice end to the day.

All I want to do is read to the kids, surf the internet, get some sunshine and a pedicure. Oh, well. There is time for everything under the sun.

I do find it helpful to make myself a list. It is inspiring to get it all down on paper somehow. It is also very satisfying to cross things off. Much like weed-whacking is a stress-reliever for me. There is nothing more satisfying (well, this is overstated a bit) than being able to whack down the tall grass and weeds in one arc of your arm, and an overcharged whacking machine. You might not understand my parallel...sorry about that.

Anyway, so today, in this blog I've made my list of things to do, capping the night with dinner. So, I will work backwards from there and make this a great day.

The barking continues...poor landscapers.

Looking for Inspiration

I'm sitting at the kitchen island finishing a cup of tea (Earl Gray from the Empress in Canada) looking for inspiration to unleash some writer's block.

There is a lot to be excited about with these halcyon days of summer, kids starting school (all of them; full time...I won't put an exclamation point on that so I don't seem too excited lest you think me a bad mom), all 18 chickens are still alive and doing well (except one teeny runt) and we have all the boxes unpacked and are just left with the fun things to do after moving.

So why can't I find inspiration in all of it? It seems that I have too much rolling around in my brain and don't know where to begin. I hope this doesn't mean that I'm not growing...the reason I started blogging in the first place. Am I at a crossroads or a standstill? Do I need adventure or rest?

Well, I will just focus on the things I'm super excited about for today:

My large cast iron pot on the stove, empty now but waiting for me to cook Beuf Bourguignon (sp? and too lazy to remove myself from the chair). It was a gift from my sweet mother-in-law and I'm very excited and inspired to cook.

The flowers on the deck outside. Sunflowers and Dahlias;Petunias, Impatiens and spikey purple flowers that are not Lavendar or Salvia. When the sun filters through them on its descent, they glow and it makes me stop in my tracks.

So many things...visiting family, kids that love each other, friends who are driving all the way to the boonies to have dinner with me...and... if I had a dollar for all the blessings I can count.

Well, I feel better. Maybe popping the cork on a few inspiring things, will allow other concrete thoughts to take shape and percolate to the top of my tired brain.

What about you? What do you do to get inspired to: cook, clean, organize, write, read, teach, nurture, rest, play...?

I love your comments... BTW the photo is just one I really love, but it has nothing to do with anyone's birthday that I know of. If it's yours though, Happy Birthday!

Joy Comes in the Morning

Pheww!

If you read my previous post, you know that I was trying to muster something in myself to offer the world. The Lord set me straight and things definitely look better this morning.

I just finished a study on the life of David. The first line in my study for today says, "Was that it for David? Would he never do anything great for God?" It was basically the question I had for myself lastnight. Isn't that amazing? God does hear the prayers of His people and He cares.

David commited a doozy of a sin, but was truly repentant and sorrowful before God. David's son Solomon went on to build the temple, and eventually our beloved Jesus came from this family line. There is hope.

My question lastnight of "What can I bring?" was not the proper question to ask. Revealed again to me during this morning's study (I say again because I already know this, but forget easily) is that it isn't what "I" can bring. A more inspiring questions is "What would God have me bring?"

Duh, me. Everything I have is a gift from Him. All that I can do and will do is because He makes me capable of doing it. Ahhhhh, how refreshing that I will never be able to muster up anything more than what He wants me to do. What a relief. The pressure is off!

So, I'm set straight now...for today. Now to work off that creamy quiche from late lastnight!

What Can I Bring?

No. This post is not about requesting your advice on what to bring to a baby shower, potluck or picnic. I'm feeling a little short, a little lost, a little...melancholy. I find myself asking, "What can I bring to God, Family, Community?"

Have you ever been overwhelmed by a questioning in your heart, that seemed to come out of nowhere? I have that feeling tonight...how long has it been stirring around in there?

All was well in my universe today...and then I went to see the movie "Julie and Julia." On my way home tonight I was bombarded with feelings of inadequacy, lack of courage and wonder about what I'm doing with my life. How does a sweet movie unleash this kind of backlash, you ask? I assure you, it is me, not the movie.

"Julie and Julia" is a delightful movie if you are an amateur foodie and are familiar with Julia Child and blogging in America. I just loved it and will own it when it comes out on DVD. I was impressed with the theme of "following-through" and courage in the face of rejection or set-back.

So why am I feeling blue? I'm not sure, exactly.

I feel like I do a lot, but I don't do anything especially well. There. That's it. My follow-through is terrible on many things and I lack courage in the face of rejection.

Now what's the remedy?

I really don't know, but I do know my tummy is full from the creamy bacon quiche I made from Julia's cookbook this morning (I've had my own copy of "Mastering the Art of French Cooking for four years now), and I'm a little tired. Maybe things will look better in the morning (perspective, not thighs)?

Rough Road

We recently went hiking with three little ones and two teens...what a blast! I'm usually bringing up the rear - no not because my Crossfit coach hasn't been doing his job, but because it's my joy to bring up the stragglers and make sure all are accounted for.

A sign was posted that I hadn't noticed before on previous adventures to this particular lake. It read, "Rough Road." Just as we drove past the sign, my ever-fun husband decides to thromp on the gas pedal and veritably fly over potholes and slippery gravel. My arm rises in reflex as my hand grasps the handle above my passenger window. The kids know the routine and break into long drones of pothole-measured crescendo. This rough road became a place of fun and excitement.

It got me thinking about reality. How often do we thromp on the gas pedal of life and look forward to bouncing and sliding around on the rough road? What if instead of hiding behind closed doors and turning to who-knows-what, we met our rough road full speed ahead, anxious for what it would teach us?

Please, I'm not there yet...I'm the shut-out-civilization-for-a-time type! But I'd like to be more accepting of rough patches. It dawns on me that we knew the rough road was only going to last for a short time before we got to stretch our legs on the open trail. And, as I look back over my life, it has been that way too. Each phase only lasts for a time. How can I remember that when I find myself in a rough patch? Or even better, look it in the face and say, "I know you are only going to last for a short time. Whatta you got?"

If only I was that brave or mature! For now, one step at a time is all I've been given. May they land on solid ground.